If someone was to ask me (which they undoubtedly will in light of this post) why I have been writing about relationships in my blog recently more than anything else then I'm not sure what I would say. I'm not authority on the subject but I am fascinated by it as can be seen from yesterday's post and one of the first posts of ROATSomething, 'A Look at Love'. In writing those two pieces (whether they make sense or not) I have opened the proverbial can of worms and, as previously predicted by yours truly, many more words are there to be written. Think of what I write about this topic as me thinking out loud in a noisy room full of more learned and experienced people than myself; you might want to occasionally listen or even engage but a lot of it will be me rambling - again the title of this blog pays for itself. Today's comment comes from a shortcoming of my own which I have elaborated on in my head and turned into something of an argument. Some will like it but most won't - at least not the guys anyway.
To start I'll have to set the scene a little. Imagine you are walking home from a night out. You have a drink or 10 inside you and you think that every decision you make is the right decision. Let's flip this back to me because I'm probably one of the only people that this applies to. I'll liken my walks home from a night out as my own little rom-com. The 'rom' being an alcohol fueled romanticism and the 'com' being the fact that it's often funny to laugh at myself. Everyone has sent a text when they are drunk and then regretted it - don't deny it, I know you have! I take that to the next level by jumping onto Facebook and laying down poetic lines interspersed with a self-deprecating zest to people (ok, girls) that I have come across during the evening. Apologies (to those that have received a notification at 3 in the morning) are in the post.
This got me thinking - which was about time as well because I obviously don't think when I fire up Facebook. People (guys mainly in my experience) say that they don't understand the opposite sex but my argument is that they don't understand their own reaction (or how to react in the first place) to the opposite sex. By our very nature we all tend to blame other people for our shortcomings rather than look for an 'in-house' solution to our issues. Saying that we don't understand the opposite sex and each individual person's quirks is instead a way of deflecting away from our own issues with the way that we interact with them, whether than be confidence (including over-confidence) issues, commitment issues, trust issues etc.
Stripped down (you wish!) this is the age old 'look at yourself in the mirror' argument - you know, the one that is easier said than done? I think that a strong-minded person can make one big change/decision in their lives every couple of weeks to better themselves. Others will coast through every day using the same old splurge of reasons not to find faults with themselves - e.g. by saying that the opposite sex are the ones to blame for their lack of understanding. It's a problem that manifests itself in each and every one of us but with the solution (or at least the start of the path towards the solution) being so frighteningly obvious, I have to wonder why it is an issue at all.
Thanks for reading,
Martin
