So I'm sitting minding my own business, trying to get some reading done for another interesting week at university when the urge to procrastinate hits. An old tale, told by everyone in whatever life they have chosen for themselves. The only odd thing to come from this particular bout of procrastination is that it produced the a tiny spark of inspiration for writing again. I write a lot just now (5000 spilt today on the wonders of English property law) but nothing that would make people sit up and take noticed unless it was to get away from it. I'll stop going on about how life-changing this time-wasting was but the moral of this (preliminary) story is that procrasination doesn't have to be the bane of your life.
Vagina. There, I said it. Penis. Oh my goodness what is he doing? Well not very much actually apart from setting the tone for what might otherwise have been an awkward fumble through the taboo world of the names for body parts. I should let it be known that this isn't going to be a pornographic post. I don't fancy the idea of someone 'having a danger' (a term that some will be familiar with) or even the idea that someone's heart-rate will raise more than it needs to whilst reading - I'll do the writing, you just read along and we'll see if we're ready for 2nd and 3rd base when we're done...
So, yes, this procrastination. If someone was to critically analyse the opening of this post then they would come (an unfortunate use of English as this sentence continues) to the conclusion that I was touching myself - get that out of your heads now, please. No, I decided to have a rifle through some posts over on Sabotage Times which, in my humble opinion, contains some of the best content on the internet in terms of writing and humour. All you need is to be able to read (making it this far down the page affirms your credentials) and have an occasional lapse in motivation. I've got a few favourite writers but the one that caught my eye whilst I was meant to be concentrating on economic loss cases was Daisy Buchanan.
Although probably not using her real name (or just a slight 'Gatsbian' coincidence), Daisy Buchanan is a wonder. Admittedly the bulk of her writing is based on 'Made in Chelsea' which I have no care for but occasionally she'll write something worth reading and I'll always feel satisfied afterwards. Her writing style is sharp and to the point with feminist undertones - i.e. the complete opposite to the dross that I slap across this blog. Her liberal use of words like 'tits' and the aforementioned 'penis' and 'vagina' make for a reading experience that make you laugh whilst keeping you safe in the knowledge that she's right about what she's saying - a cronic (if slightly rude) truth teller.
Although a lot of her posts appear to be aimed at women, her writing style is such that, even if you are laden with "dickmeat" (Ms Buchanan quoting from a recently read book) you still feel like she's talking to you. Having said that I have finished a couple of her posts and felt like a liberated woman - an odd phenomenon considering my lack of vaginal capacity to make such a claim.
Right that's enough. I can't write like her and I shouldn't be allowed to use words that I don't know the meaning of - simple. My message is simple: if you have no time on your hands and you're looking for something not to waste your time on, then Sabotage Times is where it's at. Oh ye, and have a look at Daisy Buchanan's posts - they're awfully funny.
Martin
