With another 2 down and only 3 more to go, it's safe to say I realise why I was looking forward to this day right from the start of the exams. I've now got a whole week to get myself ready for my next one and to start making noises towards the other 2 so I'm pretty happy as I sit here just now with a nice cup of green tea. I think I answered pretty well today and Tuesday's performance is near enough impossible to comment on so they can both be left in my past along with that up and down week I had last week. If today has taught me anything at all then that is that all of the work that I've done this year and all of the exam preparation I've been doing for the last 5 weeks has been good for me and it's nice when you feel hard work paying off. Whether I'll be able to cite such a positive message to you when the results come out in the summer is a different question all together. Current feeling? Going almost as well as I could have hoped.
You know when you step into a new set of exams that you're about to be hit by a storm of emotions and stress - it comes with the territory. I don't think I was as well prepared for that storm as I should have been but now I feel a bit more sound in my mind. I think that yesterday was one of the hardest day's I've had for a long time in terms of keeping everything in check because I was sitting looking at my notes and case list feeling that I knew it all and I just wanted the exam to come. I've learned that the worst thing about exams (as long as you've put in the effort beforehand) is actually waiting for the exam to come around. I've whittled away hours of my life trying to learn stuff that I already know and it's almost painful. This week more than any other time in my exam-sitting life I've struggled to concentrate - thankfully I've mostly been able to put it down to being reasonably prepared.
So what does one do when one cannot concentrate? Well first and foremost you waste time. That is the wrong answer to that question but it is invariably the route that so many students will take at this time of the year. Whether you feel like you know the stuff already or you just feel like you never will, you will waste time. I'm sure that Miniclip puts on extra servers at this time of year to deal with the demand to be honest - and that's just for me. The correct answer to the above question is that you do something about it. There is nothing worse than sitting at the same desk that you've been sitting at all day trying to do the same stuff that you've been doing all day. My trick this week has been to go for a half an hour walk in the evening before dinner to try and clear my head and work off a bit of surplus energy that seems to build up over days of desk-jockeying.
My other two methods for avoiding meltdown have certainly no connection whatsoever but both seem to work in their own little way. The first thing is something that I've been doing since my exams in December. I'll get my full-ear headphones out and play a two or three track EP (usually Twin Atlantic, but did you really need me to tell you that?) and then I'll put them back down again and try and get back to work. This usually buys me about half an hour to an hours extra work and it's something of a routine during the day for me. How addictive is We Are Young by Fun by the way?
The other thing is not something that will suit many people's tastes but is a nice feeling for me. For those that read my 'Me on Religion' post about a month ago, you will know that I've taken recently to looking up to find answers. Not religious answers, but instead some answers in my own mind that fixes my current emotions. Putting it in simple terms, I look up in search of a little perspective and if I can find it and tell myself that it would be better to smile than to put my face in my hands then I think it's working. I did it after my exam today when we were waiting for the papers to be counted. I was already smiling and it just felt nice. Go and read Me on Religion if that all seems a bit weird to you - it works in my mind. There's nothing more motivational in the world than having the ability to be able to tell yourself that you can do something - in my humble opinion anyway.
I'm sure that everyone has their own quirky things that they do before and after exams. In many ways I was tentative about sharing mine with you this evening because (a) they might seem a bit weird to you and (b) there is no point in comparing them with other people. The worst thing I could imagine is not having something that I could go to when I'm starting to feel the strain - if you look hard enough and try enough things then you'll be sure to find something that works for you.
I hope that everyone's exams are going as well as they hoped that they would and that if you're finished already that you're enjoying the freedom - just don't let me know about it or I'll have to go for a walk again, in the rain!
Martin
